Can I interest you in a Texas militia rifle? Never fired, only dropped once! (boldface mine):

A Border Patrol agent pursuing a group of immigrants in a wooded area near the Texas-Mexico border on Friday fired several shots at an armed man who later identified himself as a militia member.

Border Patrol spokesman Omar Zamora said agents had been chasing a group of immigrants east of Brownsville Friday afternoon when an agent saw a man holding a gun near the Rio Grande.

The agent fired four shots, but did not hit the man. The man then dropped his gun and identified himself as a member of a militia….

The man, whose name has not been released, was wearing camouflage and carrying a long arm that was either a rifle or shotgun, Lucio said. The agent had lost the group of immigrants when he turned around and saw the man holding the weapon.

That’s right: the vigilante unintentionally helped the border crossers get away. By his own criterion, the vigilante failed.

This would be funny, if most of the protagonists were not armed and the migrants desperate. So, not that funny at all.