For those who have no idea what ‘Glonzo’ is–clearly, you are not aware of all internet traditions!–this is shorthand for the following phenomenon:

This post, as you might have guessed, is about the fury from the right about what they believe is a Trump administration coverup regarding the Epstein files. I truly don’t think there will be any incontrovertible evidence of Trump raping girls from the Epstein investigation–and he is already an adjudicated rapist–but, holy shit, Trump is nervous and losing his base. Even Republican loyalists admit his responses have been awful. That makes me reconsider what could be in some of the Epstein-related reports. His instincts are usually better than this. I still think it’s likely this is just glonzo, but I’m less certain about that than I was a week ago.

I will admit that I underestimated how important The Storm, Trust the Plan, and so on are to MAGA (including the ‘softer’ versions). It’s glonzo, but it’s also, in a bizarre way, one of the few positive, non-trolling things they care about.

And credit where credit is due: it has been refreshing to see professional Democrats pounding him on this. Even Sen. Ron Wyden, who is a legislative proceduralist and not colorful, showed some real ratfucking chops. As the ‘hard’ version of this conspiracy theory (e.g., adrenochrome farming, phrasing in very antisemitic ways) is downplayed by MAGA in favor of a more palatable ‘softer’ version (vile pedophilic elites screwing people over without any consequences), it makes it easier for Democrats to refer to it.

I have no idea if this will amount to anything, but one thing I learned from opposing creationists is that the diehards will only change their minds if they feel they have been betrayed–arguments and evidence won’t work. Admitting his support for Trust the Plan, whether the truly crazy version or the lite version, was fake would harm his credibility (such as it is) and could lead to a sense of betrayal among some of his followers.

Je suis Glonzo.